Saturday, September 30, 2017

What's Up, Metrobank?

I've had a Metrobank checking account for almost ten (10) years so I've received a few credit card offers through the years. But yesterday's cold call was too bizarre not to blog about.


It started innocuously enough:



(Phone rings)


Me: Hello?


Girl: Hello, is this xx?


Me: Speaking.


Girl: Hi ma'am, si xx po ito ng Metrobank. I'm happy to inform you that you qualified for the xx Metrobank credit card. Pre-approved na siya and waived ang first year annual fee payment.


Me: Ok.


Girl: I just need some information po. Saan po kayo nagtatrabaho?


Me: Sa gobyerno.


Girl: Ano pong posisyon niyo don?


Me: Lawyer.


Girl: Oh. (Note: Usually once the credit card marketing agent finds out I'm a lawyer, disappointment follows and the call is cut short. But this girl was different.) May business po ba kayo?


Me: Wala. Full-time employee ako.


Girl: Kahit small business, sari2x store or kahit ano?


Me: Nope. Wala.


Girl: What about parents niyo po? May business po sila?


Me: Meron. Pero hindi ako connected sa business nila so anong relevance nito sa application ko? (Note: I was genuinely confused by this time and not being snarky)


Girl: Kelan po kasing ilagay kung may business. Ano pong business ng parents niyo?


Me: I would rather not say.


Girl: Kelangan po kasi talagang ilagay kung may business. Ano po ba ang business nila? Sari-sari store, piggery, pautang, pasaload (and continued to rattle all sorts of businesses)


Me: Wala. Walang business ang parents ko. And you know what, I changed my mind. Hindi na ako mag-aapply sa Metrobank credit card na inooffer mo.


Girl: Oh.



What sort of credit card is this that needs/compels that a business be declared? And if there's no direct business connection, to practically make one up on the most tenuous of connections?


Paki-explain Metrobank.


 

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